Stories: Homeword

Together We're Better

For years, my small family has worked hard to share our evening meals together. On occasion a child would be visiting a friend or attending a school function. Some evenings Kathy or I would work late, but overall we have been successful – until this year.

“We have band practice until nine,” Jenny reminds me. I make sure she and Mary have money to grab a bite at the local fast food restaurant, and we head out the door. They have a long day at school, and I’m going early to the office to try and get ahead of a busy day.

Jenny is a senior, and Mary has entered high school this year. They are both great students, and they both are members of their school’s marching band.

Amie transferred this semester to a college closer to home. She and my wife Kathy commute together every morning. Amie drives and drops Kathy at the school where she teaches. Then she hurries to her 8:00 morning class. Amie works every day from one until six. As soon as her classes end for the day, she hurries to be at work promptly.

I pick Kathy up each evening. I leave my office no later than 5:30, and depending on traffic along Interstate 40, I will arrive between 6 and 6:30. Kathy is busy wrapping up from another day of teaching 150 tenth graders when I arrive. Some days, as hard as she has worked, she still needs a few more minutes before we begin our return trip.

Amie’s day of college and work, the girls’ school commitments, and Kathy and I coming from two different directions culminate in a late ending to our family’s day. Most weekday evenings, Amie stops and eats before coming home. Mary and Jenny prepare dinner for themselves. Kathy has stocked the refrigerator with microwave delights and the freezer with ample frozen pizzas ready to be popped into the oven. The cafeteria along the path of our return trip becomes the dinner spot for Kathy and me.

But last week the “stars aligned” and we were all going to be home together a little after six. That morning Kathy had prepped dinner with the aid of our faithful crock-pot. The band director canceled practice, and I was able to leave earlier to pick up Kathy. Kathy had worked even harder and was waiting on me when I arrived.

“This is great!” Mary exclaimed as we all sat together for our evening meal.

We bow our heads for our prayer before we begin. We give thanks for the food, but we also give thanks for being together. It is familiar and welcomed by us all.

The next day was even more remarkable. I was able to stop by a local grocery store and pick up needed items for the day’s evening meal. Band practice would be over by four that afternoon. Again I planned to be at Kathy’s school early. We would all be together again that evening for dinner.

After the meal’s prayer time, Mary pipes in again, “This is great, two days in a row!” We laugh, but in our hearts the time is tucked away and treasured.

The next day, Mary and Jenny will be marching at their school’s football game, Amie’s boyfriend will be in town and the duo has made plans. Instead of wrapping up early, both Kathy and I will be working even harder to finish needed things before we leave work for the weekend.

The night’s evening dinner plans will be concession treats for the girls, a date hangout for Amie and her beau, and a meal picked up and served for two at the kitchen bar at home.

These circumstances could be reflected upon as sad, but instead of remorse for the drastic change in our habits, we all reflect on the joy we feel when we are able to come together as a family.

The expression, “A family that prays together, stays together,” is true. And the most important point is the focus on prayer and on the family’s relationship with God. But just as important is the word “together.”

We must focus on the paramount importance of spending time together: Young newlyweds; a family of three, four, six, or more; a man and woman who are empty-nesters with years of marriage shared must all spend quality time together for their relationships to grow.

Sharing togetherness strengthens bonds that preserves a closeness of the heart for years to come.

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